Sober Dating: Am I Ready to Date in Recovery

In Recovery by THR

By Will Gold Tree House Staff

Dating in recovery can be difficult. Usually people in active addiction attract other unhealthy individuals. This breeds an unhealthy relationship. It takes time for individuals to get healthy and find themselves. Some people new to recovery may have never been in a serious relationship.

It is important to know and understand yourself before starting to date. I have seen many people relapse after entering a relationship or the dating scene too early. I suggest speaking to someone who has been through this or understands what your going through. Speak openly about relationships and dating. One has to truly love oneself before loving someone else. If you do not give yourself the necessary time to heal, you man get lost in another person, following them into unhealthy behaviors which may lead to a relapse. You can only meet someone as deeply as you meet yourself.

When dating, it’s important to be completely open with your partner. Your date will usually will be fine with you not having a drink or wanting to go to a bar. Be aware of your surrounding and what might trigger you. If that person is not fine with it, he/she is simply not right for you. Most of the time, people respect overcoming something as difficult as an addiction.

Before you begin dating, especially early in recovery, let others know what your doing. First and foremost, get to know yourself. Make sure to take care of yourself before anyone else. Also, boundaries can be a huge help in dating. If someone is not in recovery, let them know what you do not want to be around and maybe not talk about. Do not let another person take you back to a painful place. Learn to walk away from people who do not suit your well being and are not benefiting the path you are on.

Tree House Recovery is a men’s treatment program located in Portland, Oregon. Creating sustainable recovery through sustainable change, our programs help men learn how to live sober with adventurous lives. Call us today for information: (503) 850-2474