“Some of us think holding on makes us strong, but sometimes it is letting go.” – Herman Hesse
There’s an element of control to holding on and refusing to let go. Depending on what we’re holding on to, what it is we think we are controlling changes. For example, if we are holding onto a resentment, we often fall for the belief that ouwr anger toward someone else hurts them. How we behave toward them on account of our anger might certainly hurt them. However, our intangible anger, that is, the toxic emotional energy inside of us, will have no effect on someone else. All of that stress will accumulate in us, make us sick, and ultimately rule us until we learn to let go. The delusion that holding onto our emotions gives us some kind of control over people, places, and things, can cause us to falsely believe we have some sort of strength. In truth, sometimes the emotions we hold onto are a means of survival and getting through whatever it is we’re getting through by holding on is a feat of immense strength.
Interestingly, as Herman Hesse points out, it is the act of letting go which can make us strong. We can only know the strength which comes from letting go in the moments when it is happening. Mistakenly, we believe that we cannot pinpoint the moment we let go of something. Sometimes that is true- the letting go process is long and gradual. Other times, we know exactly when it is happening. Often, the moment of letting go is a moment of emotional breakthrough. We feel the moment come upon us with trepidation. Intuitively we know that this is the threshold we are about to cross- do we continue holding on or do we somehow allow ourselves to let go? Strength comes from taking a deep breath, mustering all the courage we can gather and letting go. We let go through tears, words, yelling, screaming, speaking our truth, and more. It happens in a moment, and in a moment, it is gone. We’ve crossed over, we’ve let go, and we’ve opened ourselves up to a new phase in life.
Tree House Recovery of Orange County, California is a premier men’s addiction treatment facility that uses eight different modalities to help our men become the best versions of themselves they can be. We teach our men that every day of their journey is something to celebrate, and that recovery isn’t a sprint– it’s a marathon. By showing our men how to celebrate each day’s victories, we show them that self love isn’t about what we have or haven’t done. It’s about getting a little closer to where we want to be. To get started with Tree House Recovery, call us today at (855) 202-2138.